Kids Talk

Daniel: Dad, can you shatter a bone in your body? Dad: Yes, you can. Daniel (quieter): Awesome.

Deb: Guess what, Kids? I may be going to Switzerland for work. Laura: But Mummy, I don’t want you to go to Switzerland! (pause) But if you do, make sure you get me a souvenir! (later) And make it something that will last forever. Or chocolate, which I will eat up straight away!

Dad, we really need a dog so we can blame all the farting on it. -Daniel

An interesting new variation on the old “Who do you love more?” theme: Daniel: Dad, who would you rather see killed, Laura or me?

Daniel: Laura, mind your own business, but thanks for the reminder.

Laura has a replacement teacher while her usual teacher is on leave. Laura: “I don’t like his attitude but I do like his worksheets.”

(Laura is showing me a heat rash on her thigh) Daniel: Eeew, I don’t want to see that! Laura: Daniel, if you have kids when you’re grown up, you’ll have to get used to seeing these things.

Laura: Dad, there are a few reasons I’m glad I’m not a boy. First, you have to put your t-shirt in your pants (I was tucking in my business shirt as she was saying this), and another reason is that boys are disgusting. And (a minute later) boys fart a lot and that’s disgusting.

Daniel: Hahaha, Laura, you got pwned! [10 years old, and apparently now he and his classmates are talking like gamerz on the internets. If you’re wondering what on earth I’m talking about, see the Wikipedia on “pwn”]

Daniel: It’s good to have a mum. But sometimes it’s not good to have a mum, because they don’t let you have a rat.